A Journey Through Fear

It’s been a while since I have felt inspired to write here — I have been caught up in some extreme business recently to do with further establishing my business and my practice… some of the busy-ness has been very productive but some has not and I am happy to say that I have allowed myself to feel my way through what is productive (and rewarding) busy-ness and what is in fact an energy drain and therefore not what I want for myself!

I wanted to share an experience (now that I have journeyed through it!!) in which I sat in a massive dose of FEAR.

It has been over two years since I had a complete physical check-up with a Doctor.  So now that my husband and I have found a family doctor we are both being sent for a number of specialist tests, blood work, etc. etc.  One of my tests was a mammogram.  About a week after my appointment, I was called and told that I had to go back for a second mammogram and some other tests.

The nurse told me not to worry – there was nothing wrong, they just needed to re-do the tests.  I used to run a medical office many years ago and I know what office staff can and cannot say when doing re-call phone calls.  So I totally disregarded what she said and I burst into tears when I went and told my husband about being re-called.

My follow up appointment was 5 days after the phone call and I was intrigued by my own process of waiting.  The only person that I told was my husband – it felt that if I shared with other people that they would join me in this fear sense and I did not want to create more of that.  I found myself asking WHY and then remembered my own advise of turning WHY questions into WHAT.  That was very powerful and extremely beneficial… by the time I got to the appointment I was completely at peace and ready to receive whatever information they were going to give me.

I know that nothing happens by accident and I do like to work out where the gifts are… this experience was a wonderful gift which allowed me to sit in a very fearful place without getting stuck there.  My lesson here is not to resist any situation or environment… the more flowing, fluid and at peace I can be – the more all is as it is supposed to be!

♥
Moira

P.S.  Turns out that due to some hormonal changes in my body – I have some dense tissue areas which is what was flagged up to be checked out closer (and she takes a deep breath!!)