Motivation is a funny, complex thing. Something that motivates one person is always different from that of another even though they may be striving for the same thing.
While people can motivate others, they can only do so to a certain degree. At the end of the day, you still have to work out a way to get yourself moving. But when everything looks bleak and all you want to do is to surrender, from where do you create the will to go on?
Begin with winning the battle in your head.
The battle always starts in the head. One part of your mind tells you to move, work, and strive for what you are working for. The other part tells you that it is silliness, perhaps a waste of time. It is always easier to listen to the latter, because it is more convenient, less of a challenge, and easier to do. The former forces you to act and work. All things equal, people always choose the easier way out. But this isn’t always the better choice. In fact, it is never a good choice.
What separates very effective people from those who are not is their ability to always make the right choices most of the time, even if these choices are the hardest to make. They know how the game works and they try to beat it every single time. Tiring, yes, but it is also gratifying. There is always a sense of satisfaction in defeating your own worst enemy – yourself.
So how do you win the battle that goes on inside your head?
Understand your thoughts and how they affect your emotions and your willpower. Negative thoughts can easily destroy your sense of purpose. It comes in many forms – lack of self-confidence, general negativity, lack of belief in others, procrastination and so on.
Each of these has the power to convince you to throw in the towel and accept that you can’t carry on. Identifying each of your negative thoughts is the first step to overcoming a defeatist attitude.
I know – it is no simple task! It takes time before one can tune out the voice in the head that says ‘give up, give in’. And sometimes, even when you have already succeeded in neutralizing your negative thoughts, it is still easy to give up at the first sign of an obstacle.
After all, it gives you a break from the unending struggle to achieve whatever it is you are pursuing, even for just a moment. But don’t buy into that… That short period of rest can turn to days, weeks, months, years, ultimately paralyzing you from taking action and living a full life.
That’s the characteristic of discouragement. It offers you immediate gratification without securing anything in return.
Try to gain positive momentum every time, instead of succumbing back into a demoralized attitude. Every time, even if that means you have to start the battle in your head all over again.
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Great post, Moira, and tips. I agree with this: “Try to gain positive momentum every time, instead of succumbing back into a demoralized attitude.” Wonderful reminder! Thank you.
Thanks Alexandra!
Beautifully said! Great post. Understanding our thoughts is the first step to being able to change them, replacing them with more positive, motivating thoughts! Thanks for sharing!
Thanks Angela – yes awareness is the key to being able to move forward in powerful ways!
I never thought of discouragement as instant gratification, though I know there’s a payoff in remaining stuck. Thanks for the eye-opener, Moria!
Yes Shari – it’s when we can see what we are getting out of staying stuck that we can truly move forward!
Today I heard someone define “motivation” as “the ability to get yourself and/or another person to take action.” I loved that simplicity. With that clear goal in mind, it’s easier to work your way along the winding path with all its temptations and obstacles.
Thanks Sharon – I like that definition of “motivation” is very true and simple is best when getting into creating and achieving goals.
I really liked this motivation! Thank you for breaking it all down!
Thanks MarVeena!
Tuning out that negative voice in your head is not easy…and yet, so necessary. Love the motivation in your post and the strategies, Moira!!
I agree Sherie – it IS possible to dialogue with that negative voice so that you can get the wisdom from it and then ask for it’s support rather than resistance! Yes… the truth is out – I do talk to myself :).
Great post thanks for sharing!
Thanks Estelle!
The saying “we are our own worst critic” in never more clear than when we are looking for motivation and can’t get past the negative brain chatter! Great post, thanks for sharing!
So true Meryl – I’ve often said that we really do not need to be told off for doing something wrong because we are 100 times better at that!
Well said, Moira. Winning the battle in your head is KEY. I wonder, have you ever read “Battlefield for the Mind” by Joyce Meyer? I promise you, that book gave me some insights many years ago that totally changed my thinking. Check it out! Great post… <3
Thanks Norma… it’s definitely the KEY – in fact it is where we have the most control! I’ve not read “Battlefield for the Mind” but I just downloaded it to my Kindle :). Thanks for the recommendation!
Your Quote “The battle always starts in your head” is critical in overcoming so many different issues from leaving bad relationships to getting over one’s food phobias. I regularly work with a group of kids who think they will never grow out of the conditions in their neighborhood. By teaching them to imagine life outside their ghetto, they already won the first battle
Thanks Tom – it really IS important to help people get past the limiting beliefs and envisage what is possible! That’s why I LOVE using hypnotherapy with my clients – it helps strengthen that imagination muscle. Good for you for inspiring that group of kids!
Great article. Motivation is so important to get a head start in everything we do. In teaching high school, I find I am always trying to motivate my students that are unsure of their future to go to college, but they need to find it within themselves for the most part to move forward. All I can do is give them tools and be a role model:)
Our mind can certainly move us forward or hold us back. Being motivated is definitely an inside job. It is important to get past the fear and the negative thoughts. Thanks for an insightful post and good reminder.
It is so easy to become discouraged in so many ways with all that is going on in the world today but you are right, staying in a state of discouragement is the short term easy way out but in the long term it is destructive. Something I have done in the past is list all my blessings.. that is a great motivator for me.
I can totally relate to the battle that goes on in our heads! It’s amazing how we can move from motivated to discouraged if we listen to those voices of doubts. I love your suggestion to tune out, because that’s the only thing that works for me!
This battle is made more difficult by negative people adding more discouraging thoughts thank you for your positive talk.
“The battle always starts in the head.” – so very true, Moira!! I especially liked this part, “After all, it gives you a break from the unending struggle to achieve whatever it is you are pursuing, even for just a moment….That’s the characteristic of discouragement. It offers you immediate gratification without securing anything in return.” – another powerful reminder/message. Thanks for a great post.
There is a quote by someone that says something along the lines of, “Don’t be better than others, but better than your past self.” It does take time. I have gotten better about it, but it is hard though as you say to get rid of all those negative self-defeating thoughts.
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